Keep Calm and Carry On

Back in the day it was flowers and a dinner out, and then my kids got into school..Oh my goodness. They come home with such lavish displays of affection from their other 5 year old friends. I mean really, the creativity each child puts into the ideas behind these cards/gifts/masterpieces is just impressive.

Wait. Let's be honest- the mom behind it all.

Maybe my kids are different, but I am twisting arms to get them to sign their names on 18 different cards. It's torture. Let alone create these beautiful pieces of art for each friend in their universe.

Here are my thoughts-

1. I am not against being creative and going "all out" with your kids. If I have the time and ability I would be the mom sending her kid to school with handmade mittens and a card made of fancy paper "I'm sMITTEN for you". I actually think there is an awesome benefit teaching your kids to be creative, and to put effort into crafts they make for their friends. They appreciate the friendship more, and in turn appreciate the cards they receive more. They've put work into it.

Getting too deep??

2. I am however against the mom competitions that seems to go on. Social media in general is both the single most amazing thing in our lives, and also the most damaging. I feel like people are turning into these fake versions of themselves right in front of their friends' eyes. If you want to be creative for your kiddos' sake- do it. It's awesome, and I try to be when I am able. If you are doing it because you noticed "Mary Smith" did something awesome with her kids. Stop. The thing with social media is that it's making things lopsided. We no longer get to know each other face to face and over a period of time- we just "know" each other by stalking someone's page thoroughly enough to know their favorite meals, and most what annoying habits of others bug them. It puts this odd disconnect in a relationship where you know about them but, really have barely talked.

Back to Valentine's- if your kiddo comes home with a beautiful masterpiece from one of his/her friends don't hold it against that other mom. If we could all be honest with each other we would realize none of us are perfect. We all have our own priorities. That day that mom decided to make cards with her kids, and maybe it was an awesome bonding experience for them. But you know what? Her house is probably a mess. Or her organic dinner didn't get cooked that night. Or she hired someone to come help keep her caught up. I'm not saying this to point out her flaws, but instead to make you (the mom with store bought cut out cards) to not feel bad. Our weaknesses are other people's strengths, and vice versa. It's easy to be annoyed with how "perfect" someone seems to be because they have all the things we don't put together. In reality- they likely just ahve different things together than you. If you flipped the perspective you may very well have all of their weaknesses appear perfect and stable. We all choose what our focus is that day, and we all let something go in exchange. Nobody has everything together, and everyone has different priorities. Sometimes for me- I need to clean my bathrooms but other times I need to color with someone. Each day is different.

With that said- my kids love Valentine's Day. They enjoy showing a little love to their friends and teachers, and honestly it's become a favorite holiday in our house (especially to our gift loving Lucy). I think it's important to show them that love isn't just romance- and at their level this is the perfect time to do it. They have no idea of "romance" and yet they know they feel love towards their friends.

This year I didn't have the ability to go deep into the crafting, but that doesnt mean I lose focus on what it could be for your kiddos. The stage to show thanks and appreciation for the friends and family in their lives. Kids eat that stuff up, and it's our jobs as parents to expose them to its possibilities!

Do it for them though and not for Mary Smith.

And my goodness just be yourself. I'm so sick of this new world of "perfect" mothering. That doesn't exist. Do your best to be the mom you want to be, but don't beat yourself up on the days you just are not hitting the mark. Kiddos are forgiving, adults are the ones who aren't. There is something to be said for keeping your head down and remaining focused on your own family, and what you want for them. We have to balance exposing ourselves to new ideas and experiences, but also staying steady and firm in what we want for our kiddos.

Keep calm and carry on.

Happy Valentine's Day in advance!